Author/s: Several

Date of publication: 2021

ISBN: 9788491270966

Collection: Other publications

The ticking of the clock is hammering my head. Its needles are like a sword chasing me, as I await the final judgment. I never lacked courage in battle; I handled the weapons with ease. But now I doubt… I hope I do not lack courage in the final hour when my soul is laid bare. In recent months, I have tried to put my memories in order, to give account to the ghosts of the past. It is difficult to always do right when the war does not cease. The damage I have caused by defending ideas with spears is great. Diplomacy doesn’t always work, despite my efforts to settle matters with letters. A king is not the executioner of the dead that he drags away when he fights in the service of God. But doubt is a heavy slab. It torments me when I do not know whether the inspiration that pushed my sword was divine, and whether I was faithful to the plan that I was meant to fulfill. I have been virtuous, yet also weak in the face of pleasures, but the sins of the flesh are cured with penance. I have not borne a grudge, and I hope the women and men I have wronged will forgive me. I cultivated friendships, and they bore me more fruit than I sowed. I was lucky to love and be loved, and I feel for Isabel and for myself the absences and loneliness that we suffered. I have always taken care of my family; they have been the center of my concerns. They are the legacy of a destiny that they must now assume. Hopefully my own life can serve as an example and guide in this mission. Shaky but constant, unstoppable, I listen to the beat of the clock … Tick-tock, tick-tock…